The Excellent Wife: Who Can Find? Week ONE Recap


Good morning sweet ladies of Flourish!

Well, it’s a brand new day but morning but my mind is still wrapped on all the goodness that we dug into yesterday morning. How wonderful was Jesus to give us His sweet presence in that sweet place all gathered together as His daughters? Oh, I pray that the words spoken have resonated with your heart like they have mine. This morning I am thinking of YOU. Thinking of the different seasons you all are in in regards to your marriage journey. Some fighting for it, some nestled into a sweet place, some feeling apathetic, some loving every minute of the relationship. Wherever you find yourself today sweet friend, know that you are not alone. Know that the Lord is fighting for you, He has not left you, and He sees you. Just like He saw Hagar in that wilderness wandering aimlessly with no hope, He sees you right where you are and He is trying to lock eyes with you.

Your job in all of this? Find His eyes. Look at Him and lock your gaze. Trust Him with the good, the bad, the ugly and know that more than anything, He is desiring to take you up on the top of that mountain that I described yesterday. He is longing to take you to high places and show you beautiful things you know not of yet.

“He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; He cause me to stand on the heights, to stand on mountain heights…” Psalms 18:33

I am praying for you sweet friend. Praying that the Lord gives you His power today and this week to walk unlike you’ve ever walked before. To recognize the unrecognizable. To ignite the Holy Spirit’s power in your life. It CAN be done and I believe it WILL be done IN YOU, brave daughter of Jesus!

Flourish, WIFEY, Flourish,


ash and brett



Recap of Week One’s lesson with extra notes and printable scripture to carry with you throughout your week:

Week One: The Excellent Wife: Who Can Find Her? (From the book “The Excellent Wife” by Martha Peace)

  When you see a picture of a couple on social media looking all precious and what not, what crosses your mind? If you’re anything like me, you’ll admit to allowing some ugly headed jealousy and bitterness to seep into these hearts of ours. It’s easy to assume from perfectly posed Instagram pictures that people have their junk together, that women stand confident and bold and secure in who they are because of who their arm is locked with: their man. But, come on ladies. We all know this isn’t reality most of the time for women. We struggle. We struggle so often with confidence, with knowing who we are, with desiring to put this particular image out for people to perceive us as being just that. Confident and in love. In love with that man of ours. My desire is to have my perfectly posed smile in those pictures to truly represent who I am. To be fully confident, fully secure, fully known in my identity and here’s the question we must all ask ourselves. This confidence? This security? This glow that we’re radiating in our pictures? What’s the source of that? What’s the root of the glow?

Yes. God has called us to be wives and to be wives who flourish in relationship with our husbands, but your husband cannot and will not ever be able to fill the void that only Christ was meant to fill. There are not enough flowers in the world that he could give you. There are not enough dishes in the sink that he could wash for you. There are not enough romantic words he could speak to you that would fill that void.

Your husband is not Jesus. So often we find ourselves asking too much of our husbands – my husband cannot satisfy the deepest part of my heart that is longing for a love not found in this world and your husband cannot satisfy you the way Jesus satisfies!

 The will of God for every Christian wife is that her first most important ministry be to her husband. How often do you ask the question,”God, what’s your will for my life?” It’s His scripture that gives us that beautiful truth ladies. It’s His word that gives us His perfect will for our lives. What are the first few desires your mind goes to when you ask this question? Here are mine: career, purpose, my talent, new doors and opportunities, where we should live, how many kids we should have and when, adopt again, foster, the list goes on. But, where is my husband in this? How many of you actually think about your husband when you ask this question? I’ll admit to you. That’s not where my mind went. Let me repeat this. The will of God for every Christian wife is that her first most important ministry be to her husband. He should be in our hearts and minds when we approach the Lord with that question, but hasn’t the world twisted this? Shouldn’t live be about us, about our desires, about our needs, about what we should be getting out of life and out of the marriage? Forget him. If he’s not meeting our needs, then forget him and “you do you”. Is this not what culture is throwing at us. Oh sweet women of Jesus! This is not coming from the Lord’s mouth! These are lies from the pit of hell. Lies that turn our eyes on ourselves, that take our eyes off of Jesus, that in turn lead us to self destruct mode. We are not placed on this earth for ourselves. We are not in this relationship with Jesus to selfishly get all we want from the Lord and give nothing in return. In the same way, this is not how God has designed a marriage to be either. We are to represent Christ in our marriages and instead, we have become gluttons of our flesh and have made it all about us. Lord, forgive us! But, after all of that, can I share something with you? I know you have a past. A past that shapes your decisions, your emotions, your feelings. I know that a lot of the things in life we have walked through have stored and harbored up some hurt in that heart of yours. I know this feeling of needing to walk in defense. To throw the wall up. To protect. TO in turn walk offended. I know that life is messy and that without Jesus, we are weak. Before we even begin to throw our husbands in the mix of things, we must first tackle our hearts with the Lord.

Proverbs 31 tells us that an excellent wife who can find? She is more precious than jewels. Than JEWELS. DIAMONDS. EXPENSIVE BLING LADIES! The Lord goes on to tell us in Genesis 2:18 that he saw Adam all alone and realized that is was not good for him to be this way, so the Lord created US!
The Lord handpicked US to be the vessel that would be used to bring the GOOD into Adam’s life. Holy cow!! What an honor. What a calling. What purpose. What joy to know that God has chosen me to be that vessel for my husband, because, without me, Brett would lack. He needs me and God saw that I could bring beauty to the table. Are you getting this? YOU ARE FROM THE LORD AND YOU ARE CALLED GOOD! Let this bring some joy into your spirit. Let this bring some excitement to your walk when you wake up each morning. You are needed. You are valued. You have been called GOOD by the Lord Most High. It is through the work of the Holy Spirit that we are able to step into this identity. It is through the laying down of our pride, of our unforgiveness, of our bitterness, of our SIN that the Holy Spirit can truly begin to clean house in our lives. He desire to flourish you in all of the traits that are deemed by this excellent wife. They are listed on page 5 in our book.

This is what our calling is as an excellent wife and this is what the Lord wants to cultivate within our hearts, our spirits, our minds:

A wife who is trusted. A wife who is kind. A wife who fears the Lord. A wife who is blessed by her children. A wife who is careful. A wife who is praised. A wife who is not afraid. A wife who works with her hands (and He will lead you in this journey of finding your sweet abilities and joyful opportunities). A wife who is wise. A wife who is generous. A wife who is good to her husband. A wife who is of exceptional worth. A wife who is respectful to her husband.

In order to be excellent, we must be willing to do what no one else wants to do. We must be willing to sacrifice. We must be willing to do the dirty work to become the woman the Lord is calling us out to be, and friend, in doing this, YOU ARE DEVELOPING YOUR MINISTRY AS THAT GODLY WIFE! 

For more words from our lesson, refer back to our online message!




Grab some note cards and when the babies go to sleep tonight, take some time to hand write these verses down. As you walk throughout your day, as the enemy wages war on your mind, begin flipping through these. Begin speaking these out loud. Begin asking the Lord to personally invade your space, to personally invade your mind, to begin searching your heart and to begin revealing the areas that need to be laid down at His feet, the areas that need to be surrendered and watch as His power begins to unlock itself in your life. You will stand amazed because His word does not return to us void! It does exactly what it says it will do!


“For in this way in former times, the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands.”  1 Peter 3:5

“And whatever you ask in my Name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son…” John 14:13

“Then the Lord God said ,” It is not good that man should be alone. I will make for him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

“An excellent wife who can find? For her worth is far more precious than jewels.” Proverbs 31:1

“His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His Own glory and EXCELLENCE.” 2 Peter 1:3

“He (God) made Him (Jesus Christ) who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf that we might become the righteousness of God in Him…” 2 Corinthians 5:21

 “…knowing this, that our old self was crucified with Him , that our body of sin might be done away with (rendered powerless) , that we should no longer be slaves to sin…” Romans 6:6

“Truly, Truly I say to you, everyone who commits sin is the slave of sin…If therefore, the Son shall make you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:34 , 36

“And I will ask the Father and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever, that is the Spirit of Truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it does not behold Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you, and will be in you.” John 14:16-17

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9

“And this is the confidence that we have before Him , that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” 1 John 5:14

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