I am Courtney Sucher.
I am a wife to a husband named Zack who plays golf for a career.
I am a mother to two little girls who hold my whole heart.
And I am a daughter of the Lord. A daughter who has met chaos. A daughter who has been best buds with stress. A daughter who has a story to tell.
The emotions of being a golfers wife are an up and down battle. The highs are high and the lows are really low.
Leading up to an event, you spend the majority of your travel day on Monday. We usually try and drive anywhere that is 12 hrs or less because it not only saves on money but you are also free to take any and all belongings needed with two kids! Tuesdays and Wednesdays are usually considered free days in a way, because Zack can get some practice in and we have the rest of the day for family time and sightseeing in cool areas. Thursday and Friday are where the emotions of it all can soar. We feel the weight of being held to the grind. The stress is real as we begin dwelling on that inevitable cut.
Honestly? The truth is? I had to realize that this life my family is living, this sport and career of golf? It was always going to bring about chaos and present the unwanted opportunity of stress into our home and family. This story? It’s about me reaching a place of peace with the Lord, with my husband and with golf. I had to learn how to deal with it. This pressing stressing of it being in control. I married into golf and Zack often reminds me that it takes time to truly understand the mental aspect of the game. I know people can view our life as a stress free environment because of the pictures I post on Instagram and the fun people see us having as we travel, but the truth is? Those little moments I share with the world are not our day in day out reality. It’s not the reality we live. It is incredible and I feel so blessed to be able to travel with my family year round and visit some beautiful places, but it’s also really tough at times. That’s the thing about pictures. No one posts the hard, stressful moments. No one shares their fears and worries. But here I am, admitting to you that the calling on my life as a pro golfers wife can be…scary. Choosing to let go and allow the Lord to take care of us. THAT’s my reality.
After 14 events with only 1 made cut I was headed for a brutal reality! I was not in control of my life. After each missed cut I became more and more bitter towards God. I honestly didn’t understand WHY he was allowing us to walk through such hard times on tour. We had spent years trying to live out the PGA tour dream and yet, as time passed, that dream began to look not so dreamy anymore.
The more people said “I’m praying for you guys” or “I just know this is the week” I became more and more angry at the simple mention of prayer or even God to be honest. It wasn’t that I wanted fame or money from wins. I simply wanted to see my husband succeed! And let me be the first to share. ENVY is a real struggle on tour amongst people you have built relationships with and my goodness, was I in deep. Thoughts I often had were, “why can’t my husband have that kind of success” or ” what are they doing that we are not?” When you see your husband work week after week to provide for your family and see him defeated time after time it begins to wear on you. As his wife. As you’ve continued to trust in the Lord but have not yet seen victory. THAT’s where the real testing came.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”
So there I would find myself, time and time again, right in the middle of that testing. Would I choose to walk bitter? Or would I choose to trust even when I couldn’t see provision, even when I couldn’t see victory? I needed a true heart change. I needed the Lord to reach down in those moments and change me to begin acting in that genuine trust in Him. To give me the true ability to choose to walk by faith and take my needs to Him.
Thankfully I had a special friend who happened to be a tour wife walk into my life at JUST the right time in the middle of all of this golf life chaos. She completely rocked my world! The best part about my story with her? We knew nothing about one another, but she knew I needed to be sought after. She began to pour into me and slowly brought me back to reality, showing me how I could learn to trust Christ again and believe that the God I have always known would never leave or forsake me even when I didn’t show the same love for Him!
I was completely broken and yet, I was relieved that I could know God in a way so intimately that I hadn’t known Him to be before! I learned how to lean on Him and let Him guide my emotions of the game. I learned and am still learning how to truly love my husband the way God has called me. It’s a process. This process called trust. And ya know what? Im all in. I trust Him. I trust that the victory, though I may not be able to see it clearly, it is still coming. I’m learning that regardless of the golf game, HE is my victory.
Golf hasn’t changed. More than likely, golf will never change. But, I have. I am the one who has changed. The highs and lows will remain the same, but God has given me such peace and joy through knowing him more deeply and that HUGE weight of stress and chaos that I once carried has been beautifully transformed into true faith in Christ.
Isn’t grace such a beautiful thing?
Flourish, baby, flourish,
My name is Courtney Sucher and I have 2 gorgeous daughters 6 months and 4yrs. I married the man of my dreams 8 years ago this May. My husband is a Pro Golfer so the majority of our life is spent traveling the world with him. God has been involved in every step of our journey walking us through some extremely hard times financially,mentally, physically and emotionally! The life we live is more than I could have ever asked or imagined but there are a few things people might not realize about professional golfers and the involvement of families and travel. I hope to share more with you about this as I continue to walk/live out the journey we are on. I’m so thankful for Gods grace and love. My prayer is that I can paint the image of what the Lord has done throughout our journey and continuing to do.